Trash Management, White House Style

What is the White House’s waste management plan? At the risk of making a political joke, it does it once every four year or every eight years, depending.


However, if we want to be serious, the answer is that we probably can’t know. You never know just what might end up in there that could be a state secret, or at least sensitive. In other words, the specifics of the waste management plan of the White House is likely something kept secret.


If I were responsible for the rubbish of the most powerful residence in the world, I’d think I would keep the waste management plan a secret. You never know what might accidentally get thrown in the trash.


Now, what we can do is a little bit of speculation based on available information. It probably won’t be able to cover all the details, but it’s a start.


The trash plan has to be regular. Any building, from a small home to a large skyscraper, produces a lot of waste and rubbish like clockwork. There are food scraps from cooking, some disposal items, and any other items. Given the nature of the White House as a tourist spot, there will be more litter than usual.


What this means is that you’re looking at a repeating schedule. It has to occur at certain times, getting all of the clutter and rubbish out. This could result in a once-a-week pickup of accumulated garbage. It might be more frequent, but do it too often and it seems odd.


It has to happen regularly. However, there also has to be an internal management policy.


You need to be able to dispose of critical documents if needed. Things that you no longer need documentation for, but don’t want around.


There are more than a few ways to handle that.


A furnace could work, but a document shredder is more likely. Given the history of the White House and old scandals, there are a lot of shredders in there. The place also probably has fireplaces, both as an aesthetic touch and as the disposal for anything that fire can consume.


Finally, if I were in charge, I’d place a separate policy for the waste management of sensitive areas. These are the places where the paperwork and materials related to state secrets are handled. You’d want to separate these from the regular litter and have a different procedure.


You want a company you can trust, vetted by national security, to handle this disposal. There are things in there that might be very sensitive in nature. Someone willing to go through waste to get at information that wouldn’t be readily available.


Of course, this is all speculation.


We don’t really know how the White House handles its garbage. We can take a guess, but since even the most comprehensive tours don’t go over the most sensitive areas. This means we don’t know enough about the layout to make a better guess.


Though we can be sure they don’t call, seeing as how the White House isn’t in Australia.